I have to seriously get used to having classes on Fridays now! I didn't go to sleep till 5 this morning because Drea and I were working on the invations. 2 perfectionists working on 1 invitation liable to create problems. hahahahhaa. We were trying to get it done so that I could take it to the printer today in order to get it by next Friday. I was so worried about getting to the printer that I COMPLETELY forgot about school. I got sorta lost going to the printer and i got back to the office around 11:30. I'm so worn out. Then my grandma called asking about tomorrow, because we're going to Sacramento for Chinese New Year and all the January birthdays. She asked where Mom was and "you don't have school today?" "Nope, not today. I have school on Monday, Wednesday, and .... wait, what's today?" "Today's Friday." "OH DANG IT! I forgot to go to school!!" ::sigh:: So now, I REALLY can't miss anymore otherwise I drop a grade. Since I'm missing a week in April for New York. ::sigh:: I feel stupid...don't comment on that...

Today was a ::blah:: day. The normal school/work grind and I got to thinking the question everyone asks in their life one time or another [although, I will admit, I ask this of myself quite frequently and I still don't know], "What IS my purpose in this life? Do I even HAVE one?" ::shrug:: I honestly don't know. Often times, I feel I live such a monotonus life w/ nothing more then work and school that I don't have a purpose. I was contemplating all of this while I was taking a shower earlier. That and thinking about what Stacey, Christie, & I were talking about earlier in small groups. They asked me if I really hated high school as much as I complained about. I honestly said yes. Because I hated high school and most of the people I was surrounded by, I never really built lasting relationships. Granted, there are a few that I still keep in touch with. But even then, in those relationships, we've grown apart. I do miss many of the people with whom I had close relationships with. Much of the time, I feel that it's my fault we no longer keep in contact or feel awkward around each if and when we see one another. Why? Because I always feel that in some way I've let them down, I've done something to offend them and/or I just have some much time vested in work that there is no way for me to spend time with them and thus creating a distance between us. So I was thinking about all of this while taking a shower and a few specific people and was at a blank as to what the purpose of my life was. And that question popped up, "What is God's will in my life..." So many people say, keep praying, keep reading the Bible, God will show you, as if it were to appear in black and white and be very cut and dry. Well if that's the case, then why don't I have the answers already? Is there a will for my life? Then I remembered that Stacey gave me a present today and I still hadn't opened it. When I got upstairs, I opened it...."The Mystery of God's Will" by Charles Swindoll. Well then, if that just didn't plop in my lap...so, I guess the Renoir book will be put aside for a few days.

still contemplating...

lol, I finally started using my xanga. I've had it, but just didn't bother using it. Too lazy to switch over and too lazy to do what eugene does, update both sites. So, xanga is just for current reading, music, and maybe pictures...and if ya'll want to comment on what I say I guess. Speaking of reading, I haven't really read a book, a decent book in a while. For some reason, I decided I wanted to brush up on my artists, so I checked out a biography on Renoir. Sounds interesting. And then I picked up a book about the mysterious death of Edgar Allan Poe...intriguing, yes...So, we'll see how long this reading splurge goes for me.

sweeeeeettttt dreams. mmmmmm....i had a very pleasant dream. i had my very own customized arlen ness! woweee!!! i've wanted one for a long time now. This is of course, my leisure, drive around town, at a decent pace, type of bike. Haven't decided on which bike I want for my fun, speedy, days. ;) But still, an ARLEN NESS motorcycle?!? If only! Add to my dream, my eyecandy, and it was very pleasant indeed =D

Had lunch w/ Ray at Chili's today. I don't normally like to go to Chili's cuz I've had bad experiences, but ::shrug:: since Ray chose the place, I agreed. It wasn't too bad. Enjoyed my strawberry lemonade the most. Got a chance to catch up, talk about stupid teachers and classmates, and upcoming stuff. Came home, did some homework ::gasp!:: she actually did hw! Yes, I did. I was a very productive person this afternoon. =) [Well, for the most part anyway...my room is still a mess....signs of Hurricane Disaster are still evident in this room]. Then went to Saki & Sid's house for dinner. Very nice house...the kids are so cute. Little Garrett just doesn't know when to stop eating...We watched part of American Idol too. Good grief. It was horrific! I just don't understand how ppl think they can actually sing! I thought one of the girls that was dressed in the military uniform was actually really good. They dismissed her and accepted this other chick who was so much more horrible. I thot the guys they chose were pretty good too. I like the guys who sang Unchained Melody and the guy who did the Dean Martin impersonation. At first, it was just annoying, but then when he stopped impersonating and actually sang the song, it was great. Oh geez, I can't believe I actually am commenting about American Idol in my blog. hahahahhahahahahahahaha! Does this mean I'm going to be one of the suckers and be glued to the TV Monday nites seeing who goes on to the next round?!?! I better not be!